HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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