Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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