He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
