32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
