My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
