Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
