I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
