your parents love me but you hate me
Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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