I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
