Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
