I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
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