from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Damn victory sex feels great
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