...so i touched it.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
