I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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