he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
did you just send me my own nude
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I think my moral compass just broke
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