Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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