Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
