It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
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