I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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