oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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