i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
