dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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