Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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