but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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