Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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