how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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