piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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