he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I could fuck to npr.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
