:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
