ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
