On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
My pussy is not your playground.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Randomize
