My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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