Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
