My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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