You're completely useless in the revolution.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
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