Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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