let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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