I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
