$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
