i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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