Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
