let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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