You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
