Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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