All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I supernannyed him into submission
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
