It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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