real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
