Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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