Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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