Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Someone signed my nipple.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize